Young prospects: How to read a sale ad

This is a photo (sales photo?) of John Henry as a yearling. What a face! Even at this age, he looks like an old codger at heart--not exactly a beauty. What Who knew then he'd grow up to be a legendary old codger?

I wrote up something on sales ads for prospects, but it requires explanation (if not an abject apology). I spent much of the weekend at my husband's uncle's 90th birthday celebration. The pinnacle of le grande fete was the birthday dinner -- table for 20, me at the far end, away from what little action there was. There was ample time for my mind to wander, and I started jotting down this little chart on sales ads. It was amusing at the time, but consider the context. The theme is "what the ads say" vs. "what the ads mean." Yeah, I know, it's been done before....

The ad says:	What it means:
Stallion Prospect	Buyer to geld
In your pocket	Bring a taser
Too many horses!	Seller's least favorite
"10" trot	MPH
Uphill frame	Camera tilted
Large bone	Mack truck
Quick hind leg	Nailed the farrier
Not for amateur	Not for mortal
Colt has FEI gaits	Seller has gone off medication
Private Treaty	Rich husband?
Rare bloodlines	For good reason
Very correct	What you are when you think he toes in